Paradise Lost: My version!
by basketballgirl21
Summary: What if Sabine had shot Reed and not Ivy? How the ENITRE book changes! I suck at summaries...but just read and you wont be disappointed. Read and Review! Rated T for safety.
1. Chapter 1

Josh's POV

Every time I closed my eyes, I was haunted by the images. I kept seeing Reed's face when Sabine aimed the gun at her, or how I had tried to stop Sabine by jumping on her but I didn't get there fast enough for her to miss Reed. The worst image of them all was Reed on the floor laying a big pool of blood.

After Reed was shot, Gage and White tackled Sabine and got the gun away from her. I ran to Reed but Dash beat me to her. He had already pulled her head onto his lap and was saying reassuring words to her.

All the Billings Girls were shocked and some had tears in their eyes. Noelle was on the phone calling 911. I got down next to Reed and grabbed her hand. Her breaths were sharp, short, and uneven. She moaned from pain and tears were forming in my eyes. I hated seeing her like this.

I looked up to see Ivy standing there shocked. Looking in her eyes though I saw so much emotion. There was confusion, anger, hatred, sadness, and sympathy.

"Reed." Dash said. I looked back down at Reed and saw that her eyes were opening a little.

"Dash." She said quietly. So quiet that you had to be next to her to even hear her. "I…" she started to say but I cut her off.

"Shh. Reed it's alright, you're going to be okay. Just hold on." I was saying them and I was trying to believe them myself, I kept saying that over and over until the paramedics arrived. The loaded her up, and Noelle rode with the ambulance to the hospital. I rode with Dash, Whit and Constance.

The whole ride there was complete silence. Constance was sobbing and Whit was trying to calm her down. Though I could feel her glaring at me. The ride there seemed to have taken forever.

Now I am sitting with many other people in the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room. Noelle has already called Reed's parents, and they said that the soonest they can get here is in 4 days, but they have Scott, Reed's brother coming out on the next bus.

Noelle has been on the phone with many different people. I was sitting there staring off into space until I felt a small hand on my leg. I looked up to see Ivy sitting next to me.

"You love Reed." She said, looking straight into my eyes.

"Ivy I-"I started but she cut me off.

"Don't go denying it Josh." She said as she took my hand. "She needs you right now. You need to be there for her." Then Ivy stood up, and instantly I stood up as well.

"So this is it isn't it?" I asked, and I felt really sadden by it. "We are breaking up aren't we?"

She looked in my eyes, "Yeah we are." Then she gave me a small sad smile. "Bye Josh." Then she kissed me on the cheek and walked out of the hospital.

I was about to sit down when Reed's doctor walked in. I walked over to him, "How's Reed?" I asked.

"And you are?" He asked me.

"Josh Hollis, I'm her boyfriend." I said automatically and it felt right to say it.

"Oh yes, well she's out of surgery." _Really, is that why you are standing here? _I thought to myself. "The bullet just missed her heart, but it didn't go all the way through. It stopped about mid-shoulder. The surgery was difficult, and she lost a lot of blood. Right now she is in the ICU if you would like to go and see her." He said.

"Yes please." Then I glanced at Noelle, and when I got her attention, I nodded and she followed the doctor and I to Reed's room.

When we got to Reed's room and I looked in, my heart just broke. She was pale as death, her hair was matted, and she had tubes and wires all around her. I went in and sat down in the chair that was right next to the bed. Then I reached over and grabbed one of her hands. I brought it up to my lips and kissed it.

I looked over at Noelle and saw that she was already on the phone again. She walked out of the room, and I was left alone with Reed. A few hours later Noelle returned. She had a suitcase and a duffle bag. Right away I recognized the suitcase as hers and the duffle bag was mine.

"I called Trey and told him that you were going to be here for awhile, so he packed some clothes for you." She said as she handed me my bag. "You need to change. The blood has probably set so just pitch them." I looked down at my clothes and winced. My clothes were covered in blood. Reed's blood.

"Noelle I…" I started not even knowing what to say.

"Hollis, it's okay. Go change and get something to eat. I'll stay with her and let you know if something changes." I looked into her eyes and I saw that she was just as concerned, scared and worried for Reed as I was.

I just nodded, bent down, kissed Reed's forehead, grabbed my bad and walked out. I went into a bathroom. When I opened my bag, I noticed that Trey had already got some outfits ready for me. Also he packed my medicine and some personal hygiene stuff.

I stripped all my clothes off and shoved them into the trashcan. I never wanted to look at them again. Then I slipped on some fresh boxers and a pair of jeans. I put on some deodorant and then pulled a white t-shirt and a green sweater on.

When I was done changing, I walked down into the cafeteria. I wasn't that hungry so I just grabbed some coffee. When I got back to Reed's room, I saw Dash and Noelle at the end of the hallway having a whisper fight. Then I saw Constance standing in front of Reed's door, and she looked pissed.

"Josh, I can't let you go in." She said to me.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because you have caused Reed so much pain." She said bluntly.

"Constance I…" But once again I was cut off.

"No Josh. You know after she caught you with Cheyenne, she was broken. Yeah at first she didn't want anything to do with you, but she let you explain yourself, and then when you told her you were drugged, she believed you and took you back!" She was starting to yell and people were staring. She also had tears forming in her eyes. "So why didn't you let her explain herself or believe her. Instead you ignored her presence and that hurt her even more. She was drugged and you didn't believe her even though she believed you. You are a filthy hypocrite Joshua Hollis." Then she finally took a deep breath.

"You're right. But I love her." I said.

"If you love her, you would let her be with someone who won't hurt her like you do." She said. "Dash, he's fighting for her, and has been since the summer." Then I think Constance started to beg. "Please, she's in enough pain as it is, just let her be." Then she gave me one more look and then walked away. I turned and looked down at Dash and saw that both he and Noelle were staring at me. Then I turned and looked at Reed.

REED'S POV!

When you're asleep, you never know how much time has passed. Then usually in a dream you can do something that would wake you up. I knew I had to wake up, but no matter what I did I couldn't wake up. I was stuck in my trance.

Finally, I found myself awake. I heard a faint 'beep' over and over. Then I could feel someone holding my hand I heard someone snore. My problem was that I couldn't figure out how to open my eyes. They felt heavy as lead.

I got my eyes to open a little but the light was so bright I quickly shut them again. Finally, I got the strength to open them again, and I looked around. I saw that first I was in a hospital. Then I saw Noelle sleeping on a couch. I looked to see who was holding my hand and I was surprised to see a sleeping Dash. He was snoring faintly, his head was rested on the bed, and some of his hair was in his face.

When I tried to lift the hand he wasn't holding to brush his hair away, pain shot through my entire body and I hissed in pain. The sound woke up Dash and he snapped his head up. Then he turned and saw that I was awake. Immediately his eyes just filled with relief.

He stood up and kissed my forehead. When his lips touch my forehead, it felt like it was on fire, and my insides were jumping up and down.

"Thank god you're awake." He said as he sat back down. Then I looked over at Noelle and Dash knew what I was thinking. "We talked and I told her about my feelings for you, and we agreed that it was best to break-up." Dash said.

"Reed, I love Dash. I always will but I realize that I love him more as a brother now." Noelle said as she got off the couch. Even in yoga pants and a tank top, she looked so beautiful. "I will always want what's best for him, and I think you are what he needs in his life. As his ex-girlfriend, if he was to date someone else, I'm glad it's you." Wow, I didn't think Noelle was that deep, and when I looked over at Dash he was thinking the same thing. "Now if you excuse me, I have some calls to make." Then she walked out of the room leaving me and Dash alone.

I looked over at Dash, and we just stared into each other's eyes. We didn't say anything for awhile. I felt so weak that I didn't think that I could even talk.

"What happened?" I asked, but it barely came out as a whisper. All I remember is confronting Sabine and her shooting me.

"Well after Sabine shot you, Gage and Whit attacked her before she could do anything." I had to remember to thank them later. "Then when the paramedics came and you were whisked away, we all came and waited for you while you were in surgery. Which by the way took 5 hours, everyone was on haywire mode. Then after your surgery they brought you up here." He said and then brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it. "We were so worried about you. The doctors said you had lost so much blood, and you were connected to so many wires. I thought we were going to lose you." A tear started to roll down his cheek and I slipped my hand around his neck and pulled him, and I kissed the tear away.

Then when I broke away, he leaned down and kissed me on the lips. At that moment, it felt as if the world exploded. Fireworks were going all over the place. When we broke away I had to ask the question.

"How many days?" I asked.

"12 days." He said quietly. "Do you need anything?" He asked.

"Mmm." I said, "How about something for my shoulder, it really hurts, and the something to eat?" I asked.

"Coming right up." He stood up and then bent down to kiss me on the forehead again, and then I snaked my arm around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. He walked out and when I looked at the door I saw Josh.

"Josh…."I said but he just turned away and walked away.

For the next couple of days I thought about Josh and how hurt his face seemed. My parents came in, and we talked for a good amount of time. When Dash came back, they really got to know each other. Then Dash did the most unpredictable thing ever.

"Mr. and Mrs. Brennan, I was wondering if it would be alright if Reed spent the break with me and my family. We usually go to our house in New York, and I know my parents would love to meet her. Also I am sure that if she does go back to Croton, she will be bombard by the press." He said. He was lying down next to me on the bed. He had his arm around me and I was snuggled deep in him.

"Well, it's alright with us. We never really celebrate Christmas, and Scott isn't coming back. Reed, it's your choice." My dad said.

I looked at Dash, "Are you sure it's okay?" I didn't want to impose, but I didn't want to spend my Christmas in Croton.

"Of course." He said and then he kissed the top of my head.

"Then I would love to." I said. It was all settled, I was to spend Christmas vacation with Dash. We talk awhile before the doctor came in.

"Now Reed has been showing much improvement, that I think we can release her tomorrow." My doctor said, and I was just so happy to know that I could leave. "Reed, you are going to have to stay in a sling for a few weeks, and you'll need to go to physical therapy to get your arm movement back. Also I have prescribed some pain medication for the pain." I didn't mind that, I was just happy that I would finally be able to leave the hospital.

All of the Billings girls and my friends had to return to Easton because class was still going. Dash though was already on winter break so he stayed with me every day. Then my parents said they had to get going back to the hotel and that they would see me tomorrow.

"New York?" I asked.

"Well usually we go to St. Bart's with a bunch of people, but this Christmas I want it to be just you and me." He said, and then he bent down and kissed me. I loved just feeling his lips on mine, and just his entire body. It was amazing.

My parents came by the next day to sign some papers, say goodbye to me and then they had left leaving me alone with Dash. I was still dressed in some pajamas and I would need some help changing.

"Dash?" I called out.

"Yeah?" He asked coming out of the bathroom.

"I um...I need help." I said sheepishly.

He looked at me with curiosity. "With?"

I felt the blush creeping up into my cheeks. "Changing." I said.

"Of course I'll help you. I don't want anyone else looking at you like that." Then he walked over to where I was standing by the bed and kissed me so tenderly. I knew that he was really looking out for me, and didn't want anyone seeing me half-naked.

I had already pulled out the clothes I was going to wear. The classic jeans and sweater that Noelle had bought for me.

Dash was very careful with me. He slid my pajama pants down and my underwear. Then I handed him the black lacey underwear that I picked out and he slid those up my legs and into position. Everywhere he touched, my skinned tingled. Then he slid up the jeans as slowly as he could. When he was done with my jeans, he then helped me get my arm out of the sling so I could take my shirt off.

It didn't hurt that bad, but it wasn't pain free. Then he slowly took off the tank top I was wearing. Not once did he break eye contact. I felt his hands linger on my waist, and then he reach behind and unhooked my bra. Still looking at me, I handed him my black lacey bra that matched my underwear and he clasped that on. Then he took the sweater and pulled in on me. I then put my sling back on.

He pulled me into him and we kissed for what seemed eternity. "Dash we need to go. I don't want to hang around this hospital any longer." I said as we broke apart.

"Alright." He said, and then he let go of me and I instantly felt vulnerable. He grabbed my bags and then placed a protective hand on my back and led me out of the hospital. Outside was his car that was waiting for him. I stood next to him as he loaded my back into the trunk. Then he opened the passenger door for me, and helped me in.

When I was all settled in, he walked around the front of the car to his side, and then got in. He started the car, and then we started our car ride to New York. At a red light, he took one hand off the steering wheel and placed it on my lap. I took my good hand and started to play with it.

Then I don't know when, but part way through I fell asleep. The next thing I knew we were in front of the most gorgeous house ever, and it looked so perfect covered in snow.

A/N: Do you like it?? Please please please review and tell me what you think.

Here are some pictures,

Dash's car: .com/ss/06/02/chicago_preview/image/lincoln_

House in New York: .


	2. AN

Hey everyone!

I know it has been FOREVER since I've updated and I am really sorry for that. I have been busy with school and friends and lacrosse games and what not. Anyway this week is my last week and starting tomorrow I have exams :/. So it's my goal that by Friday I will start writing again and update. This summer, I will be able to update A LOT! So in the summer is when I will make up for the fact that during this school year, I haven't updated that fast. Thank you all so much who continue to read my stories and review and just follow me. You are the best and keep your eye out for more of my stories and more chapters.

Love Always,

Ali Nicole 3 (:


End file.
